If you care about someone, show them – and put away your phone

It takes time and attention to look after other people – and ourselves. And there are so many distractions to overcome

Years ago I was sitting in a cafe before work when an exhausted-looking man and his toddler son came in. A “One cappuccino and one babyccino please” later, they sat at the table next to mine. The boy was a bit snotty and whiny, and I could see his dad was working hard to keep him entertained, to give him the time and attention he needed. And then I saw the moment where that time and attention ran out. The man’s focus slipped away, his hand dropping down to his pocket, his tired eyes sliding across to the screen as he eased out his phone …

And then I saw the scream. I saw it before I heard it, because the very loud scream was preceded by a terrifying silent scream (my own child also does a very potent silent scream, so I recognise this retrospectively). The father realised at this point that the game was up, shoved his phone back in his pocket and, defeated, carried his child out of the cafe in one arm, his other hand steering the empty pushchair.

Continue reading… It takes time and attention to look after other people – and ourselves. And there are so many distractions to overcome Years ago I was sitting in a cafe before work when an exhausted-looking man and his toddler son came in. A “One cappuccino and one babyccino please” later, they sat at the table next to mine. The boy was a bit snotty and whiny, and I could see his dad was working hard to keep him entertained, to give him the time and attention he needed. And then I saw the moment where that time and attention ran out. The man’s focus slipped away, his hand dropping down to his pocket, his tired eyes sliding across to the screen as he eased out his phone …And then I saw the scream. I saw it before I heard it, because the very loud scream was preceded by a terrifying silent scream (my own child also does a very potent silent scream, so I recognise this retrospectively). The father realised at this point that the game was up, shoved his phone back in his pocket and, defeated, carried his child out of the cafe in one arm, his other hand steering the empty pushchair. Continue reading… Counselling and therapy, Mental health, Parents and parenting, Life and style, Family, Health, Society 

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